Isolation and Intimacy in Relations

Building relations takes time and soul energy. Still, this is a rewarding process. To achieve the best desired result, you have to go this way wisely. With time, partners develop the necessary communication skills; until that, however, they may encounter numerous obstacles of different nature. According to psychologists, a problem of finding a balance between isolation and intimacy may arise at a certain stage of relations between a man and a woman.

What Is the Problem

When speaking of intimacy in relations, we do not necessarily mean sex. The notion covers a much broader area and refers primarily to any kind of loving, comfortable relations based on sharing common attitudes and values. Actually, this is more about romantic communication than sex. As such, people may have intimate relations with their old friends, where sex is not involved at all (source: ).

Isolation is an important part of relations too. The term implies an individual’s desire to keep a distance and avoid intimacy when they are not ready or willing to open up their heart to another person. Each of us possesses this quality to a different extent. Oftentimes, it is the desire to remain isolated that prevents establishing a closer relationship. This kind of reluctance can be a result of former experience or coming apart with a partner recently. In its excessive form, isolation can lead to loneliness.

Causes of Isolation and Intimacy

Whatever the actual underlying reasons are, it’s up to you to choose how close your new relations will be. With isolation as a starting point, you decide how far you are willing to move along this way and if you feel like sharing your thoughts and life plans with another person. This determines whether you are going to eventually become true partners. Intimacy is developed only when each party puts itself out there and receives the same trust in return.

If your openness is rebuked, this means rejection, unwillingness of the other party. The reasons may vary subject to a particular person or their situation. There are some common implications though. Once rejected in their sincere endeavor, a young man or a woman can withdraw and take a defensive attitude in an attempt to keep their self-esteem unaffected. More sensitive individuals may face depleted confidence and fear of entering a new relationship. This state of extreme isolation can last for years.

How to Achieve Intimacy After Isolation

Intimacy and isolation are not something good or bad, yet just different stages of the relation establishment process. This means that you can be in control, which, however, requires certain communication skills. Being a result of a past rejection or an individual’s inherent fears, isolation is fraud with depleted social activity and giving up any further attempts to look for fulfilling romantic relations. This, in turn, is a negative behavior pattern, from both a personal and social perspectives.

The first step you should make to leave isolation behind you, not to be purple and move towards the intimacy phase is to stop avoiding other people. Instead, try to be welcoming and open to them. This may be quite difficult, but you have to come through. Studies show that prolonged isolation can be a cause of both mental and somatic conditions including depression and cardiovascular diseases.

Entering a relationship without establishing intimate bonds can be an interim solution. However, don’t get stuck with it for a long time. Remember that you have to hone your social skills instead of isolating yourself from people around you. If you struggle with this soul recovery, consider seeking help from a professional therapist.